Some of you might remember my previous post on the infamous Cheeseburger in a Can. They’re sold by a company in Germany, and they weren’t taking direct orders directly from America. A couple months ago, my wife told me she had a friend in Germany that could order this oddity for us. I asked for two cans, and they arrived earlier this week. Why two cans? One was for our collection of weird food, and one was…to eat.
Here’s how the product looks according to the Trekking Malhzeiten Online Store:

Looks appetizing, right?
Did the actual canned cheeseburger possibly resemble that picture? Not even close.

As you might expect, the lettuce, tomato, and cheese that appear in the promotional image are nowhere to be found.
How did it taste? I thought it was pretty gross. The meat didn’t taste like a burger at all and was more like a sausage patty in both flavor and texture. The top bun piece looked fairly normal, but when you removed the burger from the can, the bottom bun was soggy and disgusting. There was a fairly strong cheese-like odor, as well.
Overall, I thought it was like a really disgusting school cafeteria hamburger. It was so bad that I actually needed a beer…at 11am. I don’t normally drink, and when I do it’s not first thing in the morning, but I really wanted some alcohol to disinfect my mouth. Luckily, I had some leftover beers from a party still in the fridge.
(For the record, my wife didn’t think it was as bad as I did, but the general consensus was that it was disgusting.)
Here’s the full picture set:
Luckily, I made it up to my stomach later in the day when we went to Chez Maman in San Francisco for dinner and treated myself to this amazing burger topped with Gruyere, bacon and an over-easy egg:

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{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
That canned cheeseburger is TERRIFYING, and this comes from a guy who for a while found solace in vending machine/throw in the microwave cheeseburgers. thank the GODS that you threw us the Chez Marman burger.
Long time listener, first time caller,
r.
Good lord, Arnold. I almost lost my lunch looking at those pictures. What’s the opposite of food porn?
Now on to the opposite end of the burger spectrum!
http://tinyurl.com/5j5ho4
@Ty: I’m totally going to eat that burger one day…either in NY or Vegas.
I totally agree with Steph!
they need to can sex and see what it looks like after you open it.
Again, we come back to the old saying… If can, can. If no can, no can.
That canned cheeseburger. NO CAN!!!! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO CAN!!! PLEASE! IT’S TORTURE!!
I’d eat a prune before that – and I HATE prunes…
Dude, that burger in a can looks nasty. Who would have known they’d come up with an idea like that. bah…
How was that burger at Chez Maman? The only time I had a burger with an egg was in Absinthe. The egg adds a nice touch.
@Lando: Chez Maman makes some of my favorite burgers around. :-)
I’m gavomiting…
Yikes! This is just wrong, wrong, wrong. I can’t believe you guys actually ate that thing! I guess that’s the joy of having your own food blog.
Bon appetit!
@Paul: I don’t know if “joy” is the right word, but we do have a responsibility to make these things public. :-)
It’s the seventh photo that does it for me. It’s still raw! :)
@Tom Aarons: Yeah…I noticed that and actually ended up microwaving it before eating it.